Scoreboard

EPISODE 55 covered the following super important topics....

 

Bicentennial + Metric System Propaganda

“Take 10, America” PSAs from the 70s encouraging kids to learn the metric system.

Bubblegum Cigarettes, Cigars, and Simulated Tobacco Products

How candy was used to simulate grown-up vices like chewing tobacco and cigarettes.

Encyclopedia Britannica Commercial

A bored kid with NASA-level gear still needing a book set for a school report.

Andy Griffith Show (Stone Skipping Whistle Theme)

Chris and Jeff call back the iconic black-and-white show's opening scene and theme song.

Escape to Witch Mountain / 70s Orphan Kidnap Van Culture

Recalling how 70s media constantly portrayed children hopping into strange RVs with adult men — and nobody blinked.

Dewey Decimal System / Microfiche Nerd Love

Riffs on the old library research tech — including those long drawers and microfiche stations.

 

🔷 Jeff’s Pulls:

1. Initialed Helicopter Pilots
   Clever commentary on the trope of helicopter pilots always being named with initials.
   Score: 60,000 points – Niche pop trope analysis.
2. Big League Chew Manufacturing Breakdown
   An in-depth takedown of how Big League Chew was made, complete with garden shovel comparisons and “the extruder.”
   Score: 85,000 points – Sensory overload nostalgia meets modern horror.
3. The Library Girl Mini Love Story
   A touching coming-of-age moment sparked by a junior high library crush, told with cinematic flair.
   Score: 55,000 points – Sweet, weirdly universal, and very era-specific.
4. Sees Candy Video Comparison
   Comparing the Big League Chew factory footage to unappetizing See’s Candy factory clips.
   Score: 45,000 points – Food nostalgia with a critical eye.

🟦 Jeff’s Total Score: 245,000 points

 

🔶 Chris’s Pulls:

1. Starsky & Hutch / 21 Jump Street Kilo Math Memory
   Chfis remembers learning what a kilo is (2.2 lbs) from 70s and 80s cop shows.
   Score: 60,000 points – Niche TV reference with cultural context.
2. Lester Mainwaring as Mentor (Shazam)
   Chris references the character "Mentor" and actor Lester Mainwaring, even calling out 70s RV grooming weirdness.
   Score: 90,000 points – Obscure and unsettlingly accurate.
3. Robert Ginty – B-movie Actor (The Exterminator, Baa Baa Black Sheep)
   Pulls Robert Ginty out of nowhere and ties him to revenge flicks and military drama.
   Score: 100,000 points – Absolutely absurd and hyper-obscure.
4. Scotchmallow Love
   Shoutout to Sees Candy's “Scotch Mallows” as superior to Circus Peanuts.
   Score: 35,000 points – Foodie nostalgia for candy connoisseurs.

🟨 Chris’s Total Score: 285,000 points

 

EPISODE 54 covered the following super important topics....

 

Teen Dreams and Tiger Beat: A Deep Dive into Pop Culture Puppy Love

Jeff and Chris take a detour into the glittery world of teen idols, tracing the phenomenon from the early days of Ricky Nelson and Ozzie and Harriet through the manufactured mania of Donny and Jimmy Osmond, all the way to the pastel poster boys of Tiger Beat fame like Shaun Cassidy and Leif Garrett.

Easy-Bake Oven (multiple decades, plus legal commentary)

An all-time classic girl toy, dissected with hilarious legal and safety scrutiny. Bonus for calling it a "nuclear reactor for children."

Dream Phone board game commercial breakdown

Complete dissection of the phone game for girls obsessed with finding out who liked them. Includes a faux-CSI girl squad.

 

🔹 Jeff’s Pulls:

1. “Total Eclipse of the Heart” by Bonnie Tyler
   Jeff kicks things off with this wildly melodramatic 80s power ballad that everyone knows but nobody wants to admit they know the lyrics to.
   Score: 3,000 points – Ubiquitous 80s hit, but still funny how it worms into your brain.
2. “Big in Japan” (song reference)
   He references this synth-pop hit from the 80s by Alphaville (not by name), ironically while discussing podcast analytics.
   Score: 18,000 points – Niche musical reference, especially for those who know who actually sang it.
3. Donny & Marie Show critique (“I’m a little bit country…”)
   Scathing takedown of the Osmonds’ wholesome image and fake genre alignment.
   Score: 60,000 points – Very era-specific and sharp.
4. Virginia Slims “You’ve Come a Long Way, Baby” ad campaign
   Used to mock faux-feminist cigarette marketing.
   Score: 80,000 points – Social commentary wrapped in vintage advertising.
5. Jimmy Osmond as the “CPA of the Osmond family”
   A roast so good, it hurts.
   Score: 60,000 points – Obscure and savage.
6. Parker Stevenson – Hardy Boys / Shaun Cassidy link
   Cross-referenced with the Hardy Boys series and Shaun Cassidy’s “Da Doo Ron Ron.”
   Score: 50,000 points – Nostalgia chain combo.
7. Calling out “Menudo” as a boy band named after soup
   Quick throwaway, but hilarious commentary.
   Score: 35,000 points – Funny, obscure, and random.

🟦 Jeff’s Total Score: 306,000 points

 

🔹 Chris’s Pulls:

1. Ricky Nelson / Ozzie and Harriet / Early Teen Idol breakdown
   Full breakdown of one of the earliest TV + music heartthrobs.
   Score: 70,000 points – Great historical reference with commentary.
2. Leaf (Leif) Garrett pronunciation joke
   Meta reference about fanboy pronunciation wars.
   Score: 35,000 points – Light but niche.
3. Billy Batson aka Michael Gray from the Shazam/Isis Hour
   A seriously deep TV reference, complete with acknowledgment of actor mediocrity.
   Score: 125,000 points – Obscure 70s superhero TV lore.
4. Uniden Cordless Phone name drop
   Unbelievably accurate brand memory.
   Score: 90,000 points – Ultra-specific tech pull.
5. Tiger Beat / Teen Beat / Bop Magazine references
   All three teen girl magazine staples mentioned in rapid succession.
   Score: 60,000 points – Essential girl pop culture trifecta.
6. Candy Striper Kit vs. Doctor Kit gender divide
   Recounting of gender-coded toys—biting and funny.
   Score: 65,000 points – Socially conscious nostalgia.

🟨 Chris’s Total Score: 445,000 points

 

EPISODE 53 covered the following super important topics....

 

Ben Cooper Halloween Costumes

The mass-market Halloween costumes from the 60s-80s, sold in drugstores in square boxes. Known for plastic masks and jumpsuits that had the character name emblazoned on the chest.  A quintessential Gen X memory, heavily featured in the documentary Halloween in a Box.

Farrah Fawcett / Ultra Bright Commercial

Nostalgic nod to 70s-era commercials featuring Farrah Fawcett’s iconic toothpaste ad, where she lies in the grass.

Baby Laughs-A-Lot Commercial (1971)

The creepy laughing doll by Remco Toys, often remembered for its terrifying commercial and eerie laugh track. Referenced on many retro horror and toy collector forums.

Milky the Marvelous Milking Cow (Kenner)

1977 toy that let kids simulate milking a cow with "pretend milk" tablets. 

Swanson International Dinners

TV dinners with “ethnic” themes like Chinese, German, and Mexican known more for their marketing than their taste. Specific references to “enchiladas,” “tortoni pudding,” and the overt cultural stereotypes.

 

🔹 Jeff’s Pulls:

1. Stretch Armstrong Battle with Milky Cow
   Imaginary scenario featuring Stretch Armstrong locked in combat with Milky the Marvelous Milking Cow. A perfectly ridiculous childhood mash-up.
   Score: 40,000 points – Very era-specific imaginary scenario.
2. Homemade Batman Costume (Denim Shorts)
   A personal yet relatable tale about DIY Halloween costumes from the 70s, complete with references to TG&Y.
   Score: 65,000 points – Niche and era-specific.
3. Adam West Autograph & 1966 Batman Logo Shirt
   A heartfelt fan moment wrapped in iconic nostalgia. Bonus for quoting, "Evil never sleeps."
   Score: 70,000 points – High nostalgia value and era-specific fandom.
4. Honda Prelude Batmobile with 1-800-BATCAVE bumper sticker
   Bat-fandom meets 90s car mod culture. Utterly obscure and wildly entertaining.
   Score: 95,000 points – Obscure and funny as hell.
5. Salisbury Steak as Fancy Hamburger
   Calls out food marketing's fancy-naming tactics in Swanson dinners.
   Score: 55,000 points – Food marketing commentary.
6. The Infamous Circus Peanuts
   A divisive Halloween candy callout that hits right in the childhood.
   Score: 30,000 points – A sugary, nostalgic gut-punch.
7. Vapors Song Cue for Chinese Food Segment
   Ties "Turning Japanese" by The Vapors into retro faux-Asian food themes.
   Score: 70,000 points – Smart, musical reference.
8. Dog Training Book in Nuance Perfume Commercial
   Subtle feminist metaphor alert! A woman reading a dog-training manual on a date.
   Score: 60,000 points – Clever ad breakdown.
9. Red Dye No. 4, Polysiloxane, and Fake Food Chemicals
   A roast of fake meat using actual chemical names. Hilariously gross.
   Score: 50,000 points – Comedic science trivia bonus.

🟦 Jeff’s Total Score: 535,000 points

 

🔹 Chris’s Pulls:

1. SpaghettiOs and “Abbondanza” Ragú Slogan
   A delicious dive into mid-century Italian-American branding clichés.
   Score: 55,000 points – Well-known but era-rich.
2. Talking Tina – Twilight Zone / Ventriloquist Dummy fear
   Channeling pure 60s/70s horror nostalgia. “My name is Talking Tina, and I’m going to kill you.”
   Score: 125,000 points – Deep genre TV pull.
3. Fisher Price Barnyard with Moo Sound
   The barn that mooed. An audible core memory from the 70s.
   Score: 75,000 points – Toy nostalgia + sound memory.
4. Call for a "Toy Where You Clean a Chicken Coop"
   Takes chore-core toys to the next level in parody.
   Score: 65,000 points – Funny AND obscure.
5. Ben Cooper Costume commentary
   Extra points for referencing the lack of "trunks" and "frisbee sized" chest logo.
   Score: 101,000 points – Good eye!

🟨 Chris’s Total Score: 421,000 points